Dialogue

Since I was not raised a Christian, I often learn things out of order.

Right out of the gates of being saved, I began to struggle with the lack of two way communication. I felt that it was difficult to truly LOVE someone I never hear from, or feel. I guess this is what most non-believers can't get past. How do you know anyone is there? I don't see evidence that anyone is there...?

Quite frankly, I now have to laugh at this prospective. I have to chuckle and roll my eyes at my silly, "O ye of little faith" self. Hello, Its hard to hear when you aren't LISTENING!

Listening. Go figure.

I think that as a baby Christian I had the ability to hear what God was telling me, I just needed to tune in His station. I needed to bend my antennae a little. That would have helped. But that was not the way it happened for me.

I'm a worrier. Who cries. About everything. So while I was yet again, worry-crying myself into a little tisy, I accidentally bent the antenna. Literally. I changed the station on the drive home from work and caught the very end of a song, then the Deejay came on and said, "Thank goodness God is there to carry all of our troubles. Jesus says that none of us can add any time to our lives by worrying. (Matt 6:27)" Two lessons in one! Lucky me! Sorry, Blessed me! He is there, listening to me, and trying to tell me what He wants me to hear. Then as a Daily Double, He's telling me not to worry. Whew! How small is my thinking.

The next day, Hubby and I were talking about digging up old memories.(Hubby says get away from them as fast as you can, and like I always say, He's always right) Then my devotional for the day was about Lot's wife running for her life, looking back and turning into a pillar of salt. (Luke 17:32)

Wow, that hit me like a ton of bricks! I started laughing. And crying. But now I was laugh-crying. How silly of me to think that because I hadn't hear a voice from the sky, that God was not communicating with me. How could I have not realised it before? How did I not put 2 and 2 together every time it felt like the pastor was speaking directly to me?

I know to most of you this will seem like a very juvenile realisation. But I appreciate it just the same. I also must add that I feel even sillier now, having just realised, as I was writing this, that I hold in my hands the very communication I was seeking. A whole book of communication and instruction. The very comfort I longed for. I guess I needed to open my eyes as well....